All about Forgiveness

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Aspects of Forgiveness
Many people, including those who saw me on the "Sixty Minutes" program and ABC TV's "Australian Story", have asked many questions relating to what I understand by forgiveness. Does forgiveness mean that I am condoning the action? Some of the answers I gave are interwoven in this E-report.
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Can You Assist Someone Who Is Angry, Hateful, Bitter Or Resentful
This Mind Matters News was born through the need of someone who has attended one of my seminars, wanting to be able to assist a relative who is 40 and ruining their life by hatred and bitterness and in my client’s opinion not allowing the possibility of even contemplating forgiveness.
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Never Forgive - until you're ready
I've wanted to write this for quite some time because many people have said to me that they could never forgive. My response has always been that that's OK. I might add that when people have heard that I have forgiven, I have, amongst many positive reactions, also received a few negatives ... ones like "I am betraying my daughters", and "Why would I make the perpetrator feel OK?", and "It's sending a message of condoning of the murders" and "Only God can forgive" ... and more. All these reactions or statements are understandable. They are the same kind of things that I said to myself when I was first confronted with the thought of forgiveness. The other thing that I believe these statements show is a different understanding of the topic, or the process of forgiveness, to my own. And as you may know, the understandings I have, were gained through a lengthy process of dealing with the painful experiences of the murder of my three beautiful teenage daughters.
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Research is Confirming the Value of Forgiveness
I get a shiver of excitement each time I see something that scientifically validates ideas that I have believed and been putting forward for quite a while now. Everyone knows by now that I am a "prove-it-to-me" type of person - thus my excitement at more proof! Remember, 25 years ago when my son Andrew used techniques to save his leg from amputation, using these same techniques today has been scientifically validated and is now called psycho-neuro-immunology. I have believed for some time that forgiveness is a prime component of happiness and can in fact lead to happiness. Now there is some compelling research, a book Dare to Forgive by Dr Edward M. Hallowell, a Harvard psychiatrist and two articles on the subject that I have seen recently, which show that the lack of forgiveness can have serious health consequences. In other words, to put it positively - Forgiveness leads to a plethora of both mental and physiological advantages. Surely happiness is the result!
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Self Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a two-way process - forgiving another person and forgiving self. It is often misunderstood and under valued. With this E-Report I will endeavour to add a greater perspective.
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